Not just the Motor City or Motown or the D anymore, Detroit continues to make a name for itself in new and exciting ways practically every year. Opinions on what it means to be from the D vary, but a few things absolutely hold true. So, let’s get into it.
Only real Detroit locals know the following facts to be oh so true
1. Despite the D tattooed on your arm, you’re probably not from Detroit. Instead, you’re from a nice suburban neighborhood 20 to 40 minutes away.
2. When you tell someone you’re from Detroit, people tend to look at you like you’re a badass, and to be honest, we are. Detroiters stand up for themselves and take no bull. Remember it’s Detroit vs. Everybody and Detroit Hustles Harder.
3. Along those same lines, you own at least a piece of clothing or apparel that reps the D, which one day just magically appeared in your possession.
4. Eminem is our self-proclaimed Rap God, and the movie 8-Mile made everyone want Mom’s spaghetti and to inquire about mobile homes for sale.
5. Speaking of Eminem and good ole’ 8-mile, the actual mile road is just another street to us — it’s not where the wild things are.
6. If you’re going “downtown,” you’re going to Detroit. It doesn’t matter where you’re coming from or what other cities actually have a downtown area.
7. Moreover, the John C. Lodge Freeway or M-10 is “The Lodge,” and if you are trying to get downtown in five minutes or less despite being an hour away from Detroit, then it’s the road you take.
8. While going 80 in a 55, a.k.a. on The Lodge, passing a Detroit Cop at full speed is more confusing than not. You often find yourself wondering if the speed limit is actually 55 because the cop didn’t even care to look as you flew past.
9. Being downtown at night isn’t as bad as everyone thinks it is. Detroit has a reputation for being a dangerous place, but often it’s more of a wonderland than a danger zone.
10. Campus Martius is our city center or Time Square. From ice skating to drinks in the sand, Campus Martius is the spot.
11. Lions, Tigers and Red Wings, oh my! We go hard for our teams, and the Red Wings rarely disappoint.
12. Tigers’ opening day is an unspoken sick day from work. Often, you and co-workers all mysteriously come down with a bad cough and pretend not to notice each other at the pregame beer tent.
13. Speaking of drinking, until you turn 21, Canada is your night club. Across the border via the bridge or the tunnel, the legal drinking age is 19, and that’s what’s up.
14. Meeting up with your friends downtown involves strategic planning, and good luck finding a parking space even remotely near each other.
15. In terms of downtown transportation, you aren’t quite sure who actually rides The People Mover, especially at night, but scenes from “The Midnight Meat Train” come to mind.
16. Whether it’s the Auto Show, the DEMF festival or the Hoedown, you’ll have great stories to tell on Monday.
17. In general, drinking holidays are serious business, and if you don’t get to The Old Shillelagh early, prepare to spend most of your time waiting in line texting your non-sober friends inside.
18. For you non-drinkers out there, you order a pop, not a soda.
19. If you never had Slows Bar BQ or Sweetwater’s wings after a night of partying, who are you?
20. Coney Islands are fantastic one-stop-shops — breakfast, lunch, dinner and “fourth meal.”
21. If you haven’t spent a Friday night at the FOX, Saint Andrews or The Magic Stick singing your heart out as your favorite band/artist of all time plays, have you even lived?
22. Everyone is a photographer or model perfecting their craft. All you need is an abandoned building, an overgrown park and a dangerous-looking overpass.
23. Hipsters are everywhere you turn — opening chic bars, painting colorful murals, shopping at Eastern Market, practicing yoga in the park or explaining how celery juice changed their life.
24. “What’s good?” is a greeting like hi or good evening.
25. Not to be confused with another D-town favorite: “You good?” This simple question has a variety of meanings — from concern to an apology to fighting words. Typically, you’ll know if “you good” by the person’s tone and inflection.
26. Fall is practically everyone’s favorite season for one reason or another, though seasons here are somewhat relative as you can experience all four in a single day.
27. Snow stops nothing. It’s a rare occasion that work, school or life is canceled when it snows.
28. Construction is our 5th season that never ends. And just when you’ve found the perfect back way to avoid it all — surprise, more construction.
29. Finally, as much as people try to convince themselves with bikes, Uber and the Q line, this is still the Motor City. Thus, a car is still the most realistic way to get around town.
30. You may wear sunglasses, we wear Buffs.
We good?
Did we miss anything? Let us know in the comments below!
