After taking trips, surviving fights and putting in the time to build a solid relationship, you and your partner have decided it’s time to move in together. Making the decision to move in with a significant other is an important step in any relationship. It can be both exciting and scary.
If it’s your first time moving in with a partner, you may not be prepared for some of the ups and downs of sharing a space with someone you love. But knowing the common and not so common mistakes people often make when living with their significant other can help you avoid making them yourself!
Not talking about the why
The first mistake people make often happens before they even dive into cohabitation. You should have an open and honest conversation about why you want to move in together at all.
Many couples decide to move in together because it will save money, however, this is not a good reason to take such a big step. Rather, it should be because you both feel ready to take that next step in your relationship. Talking through why you want to do this will help you ensure you’re doing it at the right time and for the right reasons.
Not setting boundaries
Boundaries should be set at any stage of a relationship, but it’s especially important when you live together. Not setting clear boundaries and ground rules can lead to bickering and fighting.
Decide how you want to divvy up the chores and be clear about giving each other the space you need. Setting these expectations early will be helpful in the long run.
Expecting nothing to change
If you’re already spending a few nights a week together, you may think you know what it will be like to live together. This is hardly ever the case. Moving in together will change your relationship, which isn’t a bad thing. In fact, it should be a good thing!
You should just be prepared for things to shift and be different. Your daily habits may not be totally in sync and there may be new issues that come up. These are things you can navigate and will hopefully make your relationship that much stronger.
Putting only one name on the lease
Although it may seem very unromantic, you have to protect yourself when going into a lease. Of course, you don’t want to go into a lease thinking you may breakup, but you have to be prepared for it to not work out. Having both of your names on the lease ensures that you’re both responsible for carrying out the lease agreements.
Spending all your time together
Just because you live with your favorite person doesn’t mean you should be spending all of your time together. It’s important to maintain a sense of independence, even if you’re sharing a bed every night. Keep your friendships strong by spending time with friends, continuing to pursue your own hobbies and doing things alone.
Not consolidating your things
When moving from two houses that were furnished, you’re probably going to have two of everything. Two beds, two couches, two TVs and more. You’ll need to compromise and sell or donate some of your things. You’re combining your homes and lives, so this is another way that you will have to make it work.